They say the holidays are the most wonderful time of the year. While that title is up for debate, the holidays can definitely be the most stressful time of the year.
Navigating the holidays with autism in your family can up the anxiety ante even more. The season’s festivities reinforce that society’s expectations haven't been shaped with neurodivergent people in mind.
However, you can manage many variables with preparation and adaptability. Before Thanksgiving, Christmas, and other wintry delights, NeuroNav is proud to share this guide for an autism-friendly holiday season.
One of the biggest challenges for autistic individuals during the holidays is managing sensory overload.
For many reasons, people with autism spectrum disorder experience stimuli more intensely than neurotypical people. The cacophony of holiday sounds—loud music and loud family gatherings, to name two—along with bright Christmas lights and tree ornaments, is a recipe for sensory overwhelm.
Another speed bump is disrupted daily routines. People with autism tend to crave predictable, logical, and repeatable systems; predictable routines help them conserve energy. Knowing what’s going to happen also supports autonomy and independence.
Lastly, the holidays tend to underscore the challenges autistic people have with managing social conventions and mores. They often feel pressure to act differently than they normally do, which causes stress and, eventually, burnout.
Planning is more than half the battle for parents of autistic children. With that in mind, here are four essential tips for holiday preparation:
One of the most important—and most difficult—things for parents of young children with autism to accept is that their holiday traditions will differ from most people’s. As you embrace that fact, though, it becomes easier to manage expectations for everyone in your family.
Let your child know that they don’t have to perform or mask while they’re around relatives. Grandparents, aunts and uncles, and cousins might not understand your child’s unique needs, but they’re the ones who ultimately need to adapt.
The Christmas tree, lights, decorations, and holiday scents can lead to sensory overload for autistic children and adults.
Designating one room of the house to be a refuge from the elevated stimuli provides a safe place for your child to retreat to if things become overwhelming.
Well-structured social stories are one of the best tools for helping autistic children understand new experiences before they happen.
Lean on these narratives when describing your Christmas morning routine, a special dinner at a relative’s house, or whatever your family decides to do this holiday season.
Trying to fit in too many parties and events during the holidays leads to overwhelm and burnout. For every new experience or deviation from the daily routine, give your child plenty of time and space to decompress. After all, adults deserve some downtime, too!
Preparation goes a long way toward making the holiday season as low-stress as possible. Other ways you can help your child feel comfortable include the following:
Transitions and change are challenging for almost everyone with autism. Predictability and order help your child navigate an uncertain world, so try to keep as much of the daily routine as you can—even on the road.
Need some extra pointers for planning a holiday trip? Find more autism traveling tips here.
Autistic people can become visibly disappointed when they open something they don’t want or need, and not because they’re selfish. Certain social conventions, like acting overly appreciative when someone gives them a present, don’t come naturally or logically. The pressure to perform can take its toll.
To ease these potential speed bumps, talk with extended family about specific gifts you think your child will enjoy. Everyone will appreciate it.
Your child may not always be able to tell you when they’re getting overwhelmed, and while you can’t predict with certainty when it’s going to happen, you can stay ready to leave quickly and discreetly.
Practice the “leaving” routine ahead of time to ensure you don’t forget anything in the moment.
The Self-Determination Program (SDP) can be vital in preparing your child for a fun holiday season. The Program’s services and supports, along with its flexibility relative to the regional center model, promote independence and autonomy for Californians with intellectual or developmental disabilities.
NeuroNav is a leading independent facilitation firm; our team has years of experience guiding families through SDP’s enrollment process and beyond. If you think your child could benefit from SDP, schedule a consultation with us at your convenience. We look forward to speaking with you soon!